if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
