Don't make out with my wife yet
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
