I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I don't deserve a penis
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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