My room smells like vodka and shame
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
