:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
