I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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