Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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