we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
