i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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