they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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