Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Randomize
