Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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