..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
