when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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