Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I think I sprained my soul last night
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
