Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
