i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
