dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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