You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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