Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize