this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
