Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
