My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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