i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
