I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
