My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
