I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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