She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
a search helicopter?!
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
