Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
