what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
