You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
When did angry sex become our thing?
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
