What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
her facebook's as public as her vagina
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
