You work out of a Hotel?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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