Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
