Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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