What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize