I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
