I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
where are you?
Hypothermia
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize