so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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