its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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