Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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