playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
