ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
