i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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