Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
