He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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