the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
