no, he came in my armpit
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize
