Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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