opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
